Royals aboard

"I say Phillip. This pageant is rather nice isn't it."

"Yes dear."

"It seems awfully quiet. I thought there were supposed to be a thousand boats somewhere. One hasn't seen one yet."

"Yes dear."

"Are you sure we got on the right vessel. I mean the captain seems a bit of a swarthy sort and his uniform is a disgrace."

"Oh you can't get the staff dear."

"And it's called Pigeon Pie. Hardly Britannia is it ?"

"I don't know dear. Pigeon Pie sounds good to me. Bagged a few of the little grey blighters before breakfast this morning."

"Phillip. I told you about letting fly before your morning porridge."

"Oh never mind that dear. Lets recreate that scene from the fim Titanic."

"Not in public dear. I've told you about that sort of thing too."

No, not THAT one. I mean the one where the Winslett woman stands at the front of the boat with Leo DeCapricorn behind her with her arms out pretending to fly."

"Oh yes, lets. That's give the press something to talk about when we come past Tower Bridge.Bet we make the front of Monday's papers !"